it's the lil lil things after all...

Anythin'

"I’d catch a grenade for ya

Throw my hand on a blade for ya

I’d jump in front of a train for ya

You know I'd do anything for ya

I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,

Yes, I would die for ya baby"

You know I will, all I can, all I am able to...

A Spirallin' Choice

It's a spiral you know? But I am not too sure which way it's headed; down or up?

It's the moment in your life, where you have no clue how you ended up here or what you're going to do next....

It's a part of the turning point in your life, where certain promises are fulfilled and hopes assured to you....

Because this is truly when you need it the most.

It stopped being consistent, this series of spirals, now it's just a whole lot of hurdles thrown at you....And you constantly find yourself on the verge of tripping and falling flat on your face!

You can jump through only so many loop holes, until you find yourself wondering if you even want to keep going. You can go through only so much, until you find yourself questioning if all of it will eventually pay off.

If, at this point of your life you are the most vulnerable, and you feel all alone, would it be any different at the end of the line?

The spirals at a pause, and you watch from the outside... do you want to get back in? To continue a journey so unexpected, so unfulfilling, so disappointing... only to hold on to hope for a better end...?

Or do you choose, to stand out, and start again?

The Best of the Best - Muhammad (SAWS) :)

Muhammad Khairu KhalkIllah, Peace Be Upon The Messenger - The Last and Final Prophet

I wish I lived during your time, 12fth Rabi’ Al- Awal 570 A.D the day and year this world was blessed by your birth. You were always simple, always so honest, and so humble in every imaginable way. Allah Subhanawatallah tested you from the very beginning till the very end ; you passed each of them so bravely, so humbly, so loyally. You were Muhammad son of Abdullah, grandson of Abdul Muttalib and the son of a Quraishi woman. You were human just like all of us. You were the head of the children of Adam, the slave of Allah and His Prophet. You were the merciful guidance that Almighty sent for humans. You were destined to be twice orphaned, you were destined to be the defender of the orphaned and poor and you were destined to be the last of the Prophets of Allah. Your death came a s a blow to everyone around you. Humanity lost its best, the day you passed Ya Rasool of Allah. And it misses you so dearly, and needs you even more.

Peace Be Upon you my beloved, Ya Rasool Salaam Alaika – you were the orphan child who became responsible for quenching the world’s spiritual thirst for love, justice, liberty and truth. You did not join your people in worshipping idols, you never ate the meat of any animals that were sacrificed to them, you never drank wine, you never gambled and you never uttered foul speech or bad language. Ya Rasoolillah, you had and will always have the most beautiful of all personalities. You had and will forever have the most gorgeous and purest of hearts that Allah Subhanatallah created.

You had a character that left a mark on everyone, Mu’min or Mushrikin. It seeped into every ones lives, while you were living and while you weren’t. How do I even begin to express my love for you Ya Rasool of Allah? We have nothing to offer than our humility and prayers and the effort to be even 1/5th of what your companions were and will forever be. It’s a huge shame we missed out on your presence, we continue praying and continue being in need of your presence.

No one’s word can do justice to you or your life. You were everything to the Caliphs, your companions, your wives and every single person around you. Their love went beyond boundaries for you. Being humble is an understatement when it comes to you Ya Nabi, you were pure modesty and goodness in every way. You had the grandest of hearts, open for everyone and everything. SubhanAllah, you were free from all evil, even the dirt you’ve been buried in can’t touch you. Your lessons are too many to count; your Sunnah is one of the most blessed mercies bestowed down on us. You’re more than a blessing in all our lives, you are more than a gift, and Ya Rasoolilah you are more than a pure mercy to each and every one of us from the Almighty Allah.

Ahmed, Mustafa, Muhammad, Rasool of Allah, Nabi of Allah, Sadiq- al Amin.. Sallallaahu Alaihi Wasallam – YOU were the best, You will continue being the best till the end of time and after. Your life is instilled in all of us, but it does you no justice Ya Nabi of Allah. You will be the only one who will want to save us from the fire, you will always be the one with the heart of gold willing to forgive anyone. You loved your ummah so genuinely... and we pray your ummah does not let you down.

Every day as a Muslim, gives us more reasons to love you. You are the reason we have Allah’s word with us today, and by His Grace will continue for generations the same.

You are literally world renowned, for nothing else but your personality.

These are a few instances, of famous non-muslim opinions on the Rasool of Allah:

Rodwell in the Preface to his translation of the Holy Qur'an

Mohammad's career is a wonderful instance of the force and life that resides in him who possesses an intense faith in God and in the unseen world. He will always be regarded as one of those who have had that influence over the faith, morals and whole earthly life of their fellow men, which none but a really great man ever did, or can exercise; and whose efforts to propagate a great verity will prosper.

Arthur Glyn Leonard in 'Islam, Her Moral and Spiritual Values'

It was the genius of Muhammad, the spirit that he breathed into the Arabs through the soul of Islam that exalted them. That raised them out of the lethargy and low level of tribal stagnation up to the high watermark of national unity and empire. It was in the sublimity of Muhammad's deism, the simplicity, the sobriety and purity it inculcated the fidelity of its founder to his own tenets, that acted on their moral and intellectual fiber with all the magnetism of true inspiration.

Dr. William Draper in 'History of Intellectual Development of Europe'

Four years after the death of Justinian, A.D. 569, was born in Mecca, in Arabia, the man who, of all men, has exercised the greatest influence upon the human race... To be the religious head of many empires, to guide the daily life of one-third of the human race, may perhaps justify the title of a Messenger of God.

Sir George Bernard Shaw in 'The Genuine Islam,' Vol. 1, No. 8, 1936.

"If any religion had the chance of ruling over England, nay Europe within the next hundred years, it could be Islam."

"I believe that if a man like him were to assume the dictatorship of the modern world he would succeed in solving its problems in a way that would bring it the much needed peace and happiness: I have prophesied about the faith of Muhammad that it would be acceptable to the Europe of tomorrow as it is beginning to be acceptable to the Europe of today.”

Mahatma Gandhi, statement published in 'Young India,'1924.

I wanted to know the best of the life of one who holds today an undisputed sway over the hearts of millions of mankind.... I became more than ever convinced that it was not the sword that won a place for Islam in those days in the scheme of life. It was the rigid simplicity, the utter self-effacement of the Prophet the scrupulous regard for pledges, his intense devotion to his friends and followers, his intrepidity, his fearlessness, his absolute trust in God and in his own mission. These and not the sword carried everything before them and surmounted every obstacle. When I closed the second volume (of the Prophet's biography), I was sorry there was not more for me to read of that great life.

You will be able to find more from these websites :

http://www.cyberistan.org/islamic/quote1.html

P.S : would be great if whoever wanted to add more to this :) He’s your Rasool as much as he is mine.

Alhamdulillah <3

Journal 20

Okay, so it is the time of the year for things to start going downhill. Yipee… -__- I am oozing with sarcasm as of now, cos that’s all I've got.. It's been along time coming this one though, I thought I'd be ready you know?

I'm not. Far from it actually. I'm terrified of the coming reality, and all I can think of is I need to go crawl into a hole and wish it all away. -__- This aint sarcasm, this is the level of my foolishness - beyond normal. I tend to deny stuff (within my head) but I know things hardly EVER work they SHOULD, but I still keep denying minor facts and truths; just to keep my sanity in tact.

Thats normal right? Well for my level of human, I say it is. Prayers are all i have now, reminds me of the cheesy song by bon jovi - Livin on a prayer. Yes, yes... I manage to have cheesy moments for my life, just to keep it... what you say... movie like...

My life has plentiful drama, so a few cheesy music scenes won't really kill the reality of it all.

So coming back to depending on a prayer, really? Yea, really. It's now at this point, I'm fucking helpless and just need a way out of this retarded cycle called 'life'. Period. I want out. Or do I? Arrrgghh..

I'm a mess on my own. I don't need life to throw me a curve ball to actually ruin me, I can do it pretty well myself. It is at this moment, I begin to despise the very being of 'me', cos I just don't see any balls in me to actually pull this whole reality parade off. I despise myself in fear of letting down the one person I care about so much more than anything in this world because of my stupid stupid self.

You are most definitely my kind of beautiful. Have always been, and forever will be by Gods grace. You've managed to do alot of things that I thought you'd never be able to accomplish when it comes to me. I mean come on, it is ME. I stand for High and Heavy Maintenance. So I owe my world to you.

So apparently Blair Waldorf (yes i know...don't judge me) has a saying that goes "Destiny is for losers. It;s just a stupid excuse to wait for things to happen instead of making them happen.". I can't help but want to deny that truth, but you can't help but agree that what she says does run true, to some limit I guess. Cos this aint the Upper East of New York. Way way way far from the reality of that lifestyle, but still... maybe I should keep pushing? Should I?

My reasons of pondering, and hesitation : the consequences of doing something really risky for the sake of gaining something amazingly wonderful. Sounds simple and tempting, aint so easy my friends. But life goes on yes? Why am I this worried? Maybe because the balance of things will just be totally flipped, and whatever I actually do give a damn about won't prolly have a chance of staying in my life for reasons God literally only knows. And then what? The unknown freakin' scares the shit out of me. No seriously it does. My unknown. For MY life. Knowing scary negative portions of it not only makes things worse, but just makes me want to not disturb the balance of things!

Yes yes, I might just want the cake and eat the cake too sometimes... Either way that phrase just does not make sense, and I don't agree with it.

Life has to take a turn somewhere where it favors you're desires right? Atleast once?

Lord, I pray that it does. This time.

Otherwise, it's another friggin curve ball, lifes throwing at me... and I have no clue what to do with it!