So i think i am in the process of losing my room in the house, as in my folks as punishment of knowing who i want to marry and spend the rest of my life with apparently think taking away my room is going to change that fact...
-__- i see no connection there.. but okay...I don’t want to lose my room, because it’s my room. It has my things in it, my purple wall, my books, my friends gifts...my everything in it... and i like how it is when i sleep, real darkness. Like real dark. And i can cry whenever i want to, scream whenever i want to..sing and dance too. Honestly, their mind set really goes over my head sometimes. They want me to move into my sisters’ room, the one where my 2 younger siblings sleep in – one of which who lives in the dorms - but i really really don't want to. So again it comes down to me not asking so much from them, but they make me feel like I've done nothing for them and just keep taking, which is practically unfair. I'm not one of those rebellions in the family (though sometimes i wish i were..) and I've come to realize all people do is take advantage of that fact. Fuck them. That's all I can say. That's how pathetic the control over my own life is.
Me being me, they repeat the same damned thing they expect from me over and over, till I give in, till the point where I honestly don't see any reason in arguing and I do what they expect from me - it's been that way for the past 19 fuckin years.. and when i ask for the one thing now... all of what I've done is thrown off the wall as though it never existed...sigh...
so now my room..I can't move my stuff... i tried..theres too many things..and I just dont wanna move... besides I hardly live in that house, cos I'm constantly travelling up and down...it's the one place at home I have my damned peace of mind...for their own reasons, they demand that away from me as well.
Me being me, that will prolly happen... soon enough.
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